TURNING 40 - LEADS TO OVARY ALZHEIMERS!

So I've gone and done it - yup I went and turned all 40ish and this is the upshot of my favourite card.

Apparently 40 is some sort of coming of age . . . (cue confetti, streamers and big band music!!)

. . .  you know the age when you've got all your shite together, your ducks are all neatly in a row, and you've achieved grace, smarts and fortune - like Carrie from Sex and the City . . . except I'm Rachael from New Zealand.

It's the age when you feel great because the 20 somethin at the bar next to you appears to be doing a bit of a shuffle your way, so you congratulate yourself on how hot you must look, and then you realise he's adjusting those low rider type jeans that us 40 somethins will just never understand (really, how will he not catch his death from a chill without something covering his kidneys???)

 . . .  and you wonder if you are now completely relegated to your 80 year old stalker (more on that another day) . . .

and anyways you 20 somethins that I'm going to pretend were really shufflin towards me, I'm now old enough to be your mother . . .
your slightly older babysitter!!

It's the age when you gasp out loud and yell    Nooooooooooo not a chinny, chin, chin hair!! . . .
and you almost run out into the street in full on nana knickers to flag down help, before you realise it's actually just an eyelash.
Note to self - invest in decent gruts for times of intense panic, when running into street in underwear is obviously inevitable.

But what really guts me, is that according to all the wonderous medical literature we have, the next 'big' thing for me will be menopause!!

Yes - while it should be a few years away yet, my next life stage is bascially when my reproductive system begins to go senile . . .

it will begin to forget things . . .  like ovulating regularly . . .

and my genitourinary system will begin to atrophy . . .

I feel I should start a support group - you know, where all the shrivelling wombs and fallopian tubes can play indoor bowls and sing country hits from the 60s together.

. . .  and so, according to the medical literature . . .  the womb geriatric phase is nigh!!

Why, oh why, why, why are you going on about Menopause when you've only just hit 40!! I hear a few of you screaming.

Cool it tinkerbell, Im a health coach, you'd be surprised at how regularly the subject seems to come up if you're 40(ish).

Yes there is a wee point to my ravings . . .

If you are actually symptomatic and it's not merely a case of 'I've read too much on the subject and every symptom appears as I read about it' - start doing getting some care, whether that be medical or natural, that works for you, to help you through said Ovary Alzheimers.
Nope, you can't stop it, and ya can't cure it (why does a natural process need to be cured I ask) . . . but you can be assisted to make the most of living with it.

Personally, I feel like I've got quite a lot of time before I start ranting
body - I just don't know you anymore!

and Im more comfortable in my own skin than I have ever been before, I like what I look like, what my body is still capable of doing physically, how I have the ability to help other people through my work . . .

please remember I share this about myself not to make you feel bad, just to let you know how truly awesome I really am . . .

and that turning 40 is a time to take stock of where you're at, and determine that you are going to go through to your 50th enjoying life, because you're smarter now, enjoying the fact that if you put some work in - you can be just as fit and strong as you were at 30 (yes proven factoid!) . . .

and celebrate that you know what you got is all kinds of spunky (spunky is a good thing in this part of the world)

 . . .  and so I shall leave you, until the next blog-week  . . .
Happy birthday to me, happy birthday to me, happy birthday to me-eeeeeeeeee, happy birthday to me